Home » Guiges » The Hows and Whys of Mail Order Groom Relationships
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Gender equality is a double-edged sword that prompts foreign men to seek affluent American women to become their mail order husbands. Although the concept is much more rare than that of a mail order bride, it’s widespread enough to deserve our attention. 

What Is a Mail Order Husband?

A mail order husband is a man open to dating a successful foreign woman and relocating to her country to start a long-term relationship or marriage. Just like mail order brides, mail order grooms typically come from developing countries with poor economic prospects. While financial stability is not the only goal of mail order husbands, it is among their top priorities. Unlike relationships with mail order brides, arrangements with mail order husbands fall outside the traditional gender roles and require extensive negotiation of partners’ roles to avoid misunderstandings and confrontation in the long term. 

How to Find Mail Order Groom

Niche mail order dating sites mainly cater to Western men seeking foreign girls to marry, but there are a few platforms specializing in matching ladies with mail order grooms from across the world. YouMeTalks is a trustworthy dating site that has lots to offer to international daters seeking romance and companionship.

To improve your chances on a mail order groom site like YouMeTalks, follow a few simple recommendations:

  • Build an attention-grabbing dating profile. Everything from your profile photo to your bio should be geared towards finding the right man. Instead of bland pictures and stale one-liners, work out something unique and memorable.
  • Proactively contact mail order grooms. While men will be eager to reach out first, you don’t have to wait for their messages. Send out personalized conversation starters and keep chatting with guys who are eager to respond.
  • Be direct and honest about your expectations. Whether you expect to get married or have a live-in boyfriend, whether you want a breadwinner or a stay-at-home dad, set things straight from the onset to avoid wasting time.
  • Establish a routine to keep your relationship going. Build your chats and video calls into your schedule to ensure you keep in touch and develop your relationship instead of letting it falter. This will require some work if a time difference is involved.
  • Find the right time to move to the next level. Sooner or later you’ll need to meet face-to-face to decide if your relationship has the potential to become something more than an online fling. Discuss the logistics and arrange a trip to visit your mail order groom.

Relationships with mail order grooms don’t always develop linearly. At first, you’ll need to be patient until you find the right person, but once you do, your long-distance romance can become a whirlwind and end up with a wedding within a few short months. 

Can You Buy a Husband?

No, you cannot actually buy a husband. The term “mail order groom” is a reflection of the “mail order bride” concept, which came into being when American men struggled to find women to settle the new territories discovered with the expansion to the West. Although the terms remain the same, the idea behind the concept has changed dramatically. There’s no exchange of money for people. Instead, there are marriage agencies, dating sites and apps that help people from different countries find each other. 

The only difference between mail order brides and grooms lies in their origins. Whereas most mail order brides come from Asia, Eastern Europe, and Latin America, the majority of mail order husbands are either Latino, Asian, or African, though there is also a small market for Western European men among American ladies.

Mail Order Groom Cost

As we’ve established, there’s no buying mail order grooms. All the costs associated with a mail order relationship fall into several major categories, including:

  • International dating site charges (subscription or credit-based)
  • International travel to meet in person
  • Visa application fees and other relocation-related charges
  • Dates, gifts, and other dating expenses

As a result, the mail order groom price depends on too many factors to provide even a rough estimate. For example, meeting a Latino husband may be cheaper than an Asian one, as travel expenses are lower. Besides, men from successful European countries may be willing to shoulder part of the cost, reducing the bottom line.

Although mail order grooms aren’t as common as mail order brides, where there’s demand, there’s supply. In the end, the success of your mail order husband endeavor depends solely on your willingness to build and support a long-distance relationship, though using a reputable dating site is the first step in the right direction. 

Jaime Bronstein
Relationship expert
She is an international therapist, dating coach, and an "intuitive relationship expert" as she calls herself. With more than 52,000 Instagram followers, she is one of the most popular relationships and dating coaches in the US right now. She provides personalized counseling and dating coaching (including online dating!) so she knows a lot about how to attract a woman online.